Too bad, he never heard the beating of my heart

Soliloquy

It was the 28th of August, Sunday, when I have finally told myself that I don’t like him anymore. It wasn’t much of a big deal probably, but for me it is.

I could still recall those times where I would stalk him on social media, save his photos on my gallery, act all giddy when he’s around and even boast about his talent to my family as if I was a proud girlfriend. Yes, my family knew how I adore him. It wasn’t a secret, after all.

But what I felt for him was toxic. It was the kind of adoration which knows no bound or limitation. I was slowly drowning myself in the figment of my imagination; I had been delusional. And soon I realized how scary it was. I had no plan of falling into the abyss without somebody to save me. So I prevented myself from completely stumbling.

He was out of my league; someone out of reach. I realized, he would never notice a girl in jeans and sneakers, someone bare-faced, timid and awkward.

Now, the feelings were all gone. Hearing his name doesn’t excite me anymore. The “kilig” feeling I once felt towards him vanished. No more butterflies in the stomach and fast beating of the heart whenever I saw him. I guess we all deserve someone who could reciprocate the emotions we give in. Maybe not now, but soon we’ll find out.

After all, life isn’t all about that. There is so much more to life than liking somebody. And I’m more than thrilled to know what lies ahead.

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2 thoughts on “Too bad, he never heard the beating of my heart

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